


Baby, I Want You

by slashter



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Anal Sex, Angst, Barebacking, Beyoncé direction, Blow Jobs, Drunk Sex, Hand Jobs, M/M, Pining, Riding, Rough Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-04
Updated: 2014-04-04
Packaged: 2018-01-17 15:41:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1393174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slashter/pseuds/slashter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Zayn's bruised and marked up good, shaking and moaning with Liam's name on his lips, and Liam doesn't think he's ever loved anyone this much before.</i>
</p><p> <i>But Zayn's not there in the morning, and even though he's under an unnecessarily thick duvet, Liam feels so, so cold.</i></p><p>[Or the one where Zayn won't admit his feelings unless he's drunk and Liam pines. A lot.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Baby, I Want You

**Author's Note:**

> AIGHT so this was written for the [Ziam Beyoncé ficathon](http://slashter.livejournal.com/901.html) I made over on LJ after one night of listening to Beyoncé on repeat and realizing how perfect any of her songs would fit with Ziam 
> 
> If you haven't been able to figure it out yet, the fic is inspired by [Drunk In Love](www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1JPKLa-Ofc) ayyyy
> 
> Beta'd by the wonderful [Fee](http://archiveofourown.org/users/brittastyles), ty ty tysm for your awesome comments and helping me make this a much better fic than it was originally!!!
> 
> ~Title is from Drunk In Love by Beyoncé (duh)
> 
>  **Disclaimer:**  
>  I don't know anyone in 1D or anyone who works at Radio 1 or anyone else mentioned in this story. This work is purely a piece of fiction.

 

\------------

 

Zayn's lips taste like alcohol and tobacco; booze and bitterness, the potent taste of cigarettes coating his mouth along with the strong flavor of tequila and lime. Liam has no idea why he enjoys it so much but maybe it's because it's just so _different_ , just another solid reminder that Zayn is nothing like anyone he’s ever slept with before, that there’s nothing about him Liam is used to.

He's never done this before, but he knows that Zayn hasn't either, partly because they started kissing hesitantly, shifting around and feeling each other up before settling down, but mostly because neither one of them can stop mumbling to each other that they've never felt up a guy, never snogged a guy, never fucked a guy.

 

They do it anyways, of course, the liquid courage burning through their veins as Liam pushes inside Zayn, rough because Zayn _asked_ , guiding Liam's hand to his hair, groaning as Liam tugs at the thick strands as he bites down on Zayn's neck.

Zayn's bruised and marked up good, shaking and moaning with Liam's name on his lips, and Liam doesn't think he's ever loved anyone this much before.

 

\------

 

Zayn's not there in the morning, and even though he's under an unnecessarily thick duvet, Liam feels so, so cold.

 

\------

 

"Hey," Liam says, mostly because he doesn't know what to say. He's never been good at this, at one night stands, because his heart doesn't really know how to love in bits and pieces. He falls into love, hard and fast and intense, like diving off a cliff--except he's never managed to land on anything but the rocks.

It was like that with Danielle, it was like that with Sophia, it was like that with the string of meaningless fucks in between that did nothing for Liam's battered heart but too much for his ego, that left Harry raising his eyebrows in concern and Louis cackling, winking at Liam in acknowledgement.

So Liam is a bit broken, he supposes, as he approaches Zayn at breakfast, sitting down next to him and carefully serving himself some fruit. He can feel Zayn's heated gaze on him now, but he doesn't respond, not until Zayn nudges his shoulder with his own. Liam looks up.

Zayn smiles. "Hey." He responds, and Liam has to stop himself from falling again, faster than ever.

 

\------

 

The first time Liam feels sick is when he reaches for Zayn's hand as they walk down the hotel hallway, the other boys and their crew surrounding them. Their arms are already brushing so Liam takes a leap of faith and stretches his fingers out, barely touching Zayn's palm as his arm swings forward.

He feels Zayn tense and pull his hand away, crossing his arms in front of his chest and suddenly slowing his steps, just enough that he's suddenly behind Liam instead of next to him, starting up a conversation with Niall.

Liam gulps, blinking furiously. He can't cry, not here, not now, not in front of everyone. He's strong, he's tough, he's got to take care of them all. 

He sniffs, and a tear falls onto his cheek, his hand shooting up to quickly wipe it away. No, he was wrong. He's pathetic, he's inadequate, he's weak. 

If anyone notices his movements, they don't comment. 

 

"Room keys." Paul says, holding out five cards. Liam grabs one quickly and then fast-walks over to the door, sliding his card in. He's halfway into the room when he hears Harry speak.

"Li?" Harry says, and Liam turns around and sees all the boys looking at him curiously. "Uh, we were gonna chill tonight? You still up for it?"

Liam sniffs again. He looks at each of their faces but stops at Zayn's. Zayn's bottom lip is almost chewed through and he won't look up to meet Liam's gaze.

"No." Liam replies, and that's when Zayn's eyes meet his. 

Liam runs into his room and slams the door fast so that no one can see him crumble.  

 

\------

 

He's always been a little in love with Zayn, he figures. From the early days onwards, when Harry and Louis were too wrapped up in each other and Niall was still struggling to find himself, he and Zayn seemed to be the only two of the group who could sit quietly for 15 minutes without having to jump up and break something.

There's always been a bit more of a connection between the two of them than with Liam and any of the other boys, Liam decides. With Louis it's a bite or a pinch or a slap and then a cheeky fight. With Harry it's a slow, languid friendship, warmth and comfort always available. With Niall it's an overwhelming urge to protect, along with mutual adoration.

With Zayn, though, it's like--it's as if they don't even need to speak. They can sit on a sofa together for an hour and just _know_ when the right time is for one of them to shift so that the other can stretch their legs out. They've been able to have a conversation with just their eyes for as long as Liam can remember, and Zayn has a smile, a small, secret thing, that he only shows Liam.

 

Which is what makes this whole situation so much worse. He's so mad at Zayn but at the same time so terribly heartbroken that he can't see straight, bustling uselessly about his hotel room with no real goal in mind. He's pretty pissed at himself, too, because he knows that if Zayn came up to him at this very moment, he'd blindly let him into his arms again, no questions asked.

So he tears into his minibar.

 

He knows Louis buys booze and brings it with him in their luggage, and right now he kind of wishes he’d done the same. There’s not too much there for him to crack open, just a lot of small bottles of a lot of different things, but he figures there’s at least enough to get himself smashed. 

He finds a bottle of Coke in the mini fridge and quickly fixes himself up a rum and coke. Then another. Then another. 

He flips open his laptop and then goes to twitter, staring at his feed for a good ten minutes before typing some nonsense that he hopes comes off as understandable and posting it. He blinks, then refreshes the page, pleased at the number of favorites and retweets the status already has. God, he loves being famous.

He pours himself another drink, then frowns when he takes a sip--he’s not sure how much Coke he actually put into this one--and then sits on the edge of his bed, sighing. 

 

This is actually really, really pathetic. Liam feels miserable. He stares down at his drink, watches the liquid slosh around. He keeps taking sips until the cup is empty, and then just gets frustrated, throwing the glass in the trash. 

He hates drinking alone. He feels awful. He’s too drunk to go back now, though, he can already feel himself moving more sluggishly and he’s pretty sure he was way off his aim when he threw his cup away. 

There's a knock at the door. Liam frowns and walks over, unlocking and opening the door swiftly. Oh.

 

It's probably only been about an hour and a half since Liam saw the boys but he can tell that Zayn is fairly intoxicated--even more than Liam is--his body swaying a bit, back and forth, as he stands in front of Liam.

"Hi." He slurs, and even though Liam can smell the whiskey on Zayn's breath, he moves aside so that Zayn can stumble into the room.

"What do you want?" Liam mumbles, trying to keep himself calm and not turned on, which is incredibly hard to do when most of his present thoughts consist of flashbacks to the last time he'd had sex with Zayn, and is definitely not aided by the way Zayn keeps biting his flushed lower lip. Plus, the booze is getting him more and more excited, in practically every way possible. 

"'M sorry." Zayn says, and frowns. "I'm a horrible person, Li, I'm sorry, I can't--" He stops, staring down at his palms, and Liam's gut twists as he realizes what Zayn's referring to. He can't think of more to do than just shrug, so that's what he does, and then walks over and sits on the edge of the bed.

"You're perfect." Zayn continues, and Liam wants to cry again. Except now Zayn's walking over to him, slowly and staggered, his eyes unfocused but so, so dark. "You're perfect to me." He adds, almost singing it, and Liam never thought he'd be so wooed by their own lyrics.

"You're drunk." Liam says, because he can't do much more than state the obvious right now--his brain's pretty fried. Zayn narrows his eyes.

"So are you." He says. “What of it?” He asks, shrugging, and Liam can't come up with a good enough answer to that. Zayn walks closer, enough so that he's standing right in front of Liam, and reaches down to trace Liam's jaw with his finger. 

"So gorgeous," he mumbles, and all Liam wants right now is to mark every part of Zayn with his hands and mouth, enough so so that Zayn will wake up tomorrow unable to deny that he's Liam's.

"You're mine." Liam says, without really thinking about it, but before he can take it back or apologize, Zayn nods.

"Yeah." He agrees, leaning in more so that Liam's legs automatically spread, letting him fit his lithe body in between Liam's knees. "Yours."

 

And Liam's heart surges, because maybe now, even with the bitter taste of booze meeting his numb lips, he can imagine Zayn loving him like this all the time, unconditionally. 

Zayn is soft and pliant like this, melting into Liam's touch easily, letting their kiss build up slowly, long enough that Liam isn't quite sure whose tongue is whose and there's a good possibility he might be getting drunker himself, just from the kissing.

Of course, that could also be attributed to the way Zayn's pulled off both of their shirts and is kissing a trail down Liam's torso, sucking on his neck and collarbones, biting his nipples softly before dropping to his knees and getting rid of Liam's pants with surprising dexterity for someone who's so smashed.

Liam hisses as Zayn takes him into his mouth, so eager and ready, sucking on the head of his cock for a good minute before he finally bobs his head lower, swallowing around Liam's length. He hums happily, pushing himself down all the way until Liam can tell that he's gagging a bit but fighting through it, determined to fit all of Liam in his mouth. Then all of a sudden he stops, just holding himself down, still choking a bit, and Liam runs his fingers through Zayn's hair worriedly, pulling him off.

"Slow down, babe." Liam mutters, his words blending together, but Zayn shakes his head, his eyes dotted with tears.

"No, _no_ ," he hisses, leaning down and resting his forehead on Liam's thigh. "I want you to fuck my mouth, please. I want you to punish me, _ruin_ me."

Liam gasps as his mind catches up to Zayn’s words and can't help but oblige, especially when Zayn looks so debauched this early in, his lips puffy and eyelashes clumped with tears. He gulps and nods, guiding an eager Zayn back to his cock, now hard and twitching in his lap. Zayn sucks him down easily again, and Liam holds his breath as he tangles his fingers in Zayn's hair and pushes him down, watching how he coughs around his dick but moans in approval. Liam continues moving Zayn's head until his hips buck up of their own accord and he doesn't try to stop them, instead holding Zayn in place with a tight grip as he pushes his thighs up, fucking hard into Zayn's mouth, his cock hitting the back of Zayn's throat with every thrust.

He keeps going like this, movements hard and unrelenting, until he can feel himself close to the edge. He pulls out of Zayn's mouth, the other boy completely out of it, and jacks himself off, fast and sloppy, groaning loudly as he spills across Zayn's cheeks and chin.

 

" _Zayn_ ," Liam breathes, still shivering, and huffs as he pulls Zayn up from the ground, his body heavy and boneless. He stumbles a bit, not very stable himself, but manages to lay Zayn down on the bed and reaches for his cock, then lets out a small whine when he realizes that Zayn's already come in his pants, his briefs wet and sticky.

"Zayn?" Liam says again, and Zayn blinks a couple times, grinning slowly.

"Hi," he whispers, his voice quiet and hoarse, and fuck, Zayn's going to get a good talking-to for this one. "Come to bed."

Liam's heart jumps to his throat, his mind blurry. He doesn't want to feel hopeful again, only to have his heart broken in a few hours when he's left alone in his bed. He doesn't want to have to deal with Zayn shying away from his glance in the morning, the other boys looking on, confused and wary. 

But right now, Zayn is smiling, drunk on love and something else, looking so warm and soft and elated and Liam doesn't want anything but this for the rest of his life. So he sighs in defeat and crawls up the bed, peeling off Zayn's clothes and then lazily tripping over his feet to get a flannel from the bathroom to clean them both up.

 

Zayn's fast asleep by the time Liam spreads the duvet over the two of them, but he still turns into the warmth when Liam moves closer, wrapping his arms around Liam's waist and pressing his cheek to Liam's chest. 

Liam exhales shakily, his eyelids heavy with drunkenness and exhaustion, and really hopes Zayn doesn't hear how his heart skips a beat.

 

\------

 

The sun slots through the half-open blinds and Liam slowly blinks his eyes open. He doesn't need to turn around to know that Zayn's gone.

 

\------

 

Third time's the charm. At least that's what they say, right?

Liam doesn't really want to think about it as he swirls the liquid in his glass. He's getting tipsy himself, which he's really tried to avoid recently, especially whenever he's around Zayn.

 

"What's up, buttercup?" Louis asks, only kind of tripping on his way over to Liam. "Why so glum?"

Liam shrugs but Louis follows his gaze over to the middle of the dance floor of the club, where Zayn is currently deeply involved in some sort of pseudo-passionate dance with Harry, a mostly-empty cup gripped tight in his hand.

"Ah, yes." Louis says, nodding solemnly. "Boy problems."

Liam freezes up a bit, then shrugs stiffly. Louis rolls his eyes. "It's not something we all don't know about, mate. You're literally all Zayn talks about when he's smashed."

Liam gulps. "Um. Really?"

Louis snorts and raises his hand, gesturing to the two boys grinding on the dance floor. Zayn's mouth is lost somewhere in the vicinity of the side of Harry's head, buried in his curls, but by the intensity of Harry's gaze, Liam can tell that he's probably the subject of their drunk chatter.

 

Harry frowns, suddenly, and pulls away from Zayn, shaking his head. Zayn looks like he's about to cry and Liam looks away, feeling like he's intruding on something he shouldn't be. He sighs, turning around and motioning for the bartender.

"Gin and tonic." He asks, pulling out his wallet. "Heavy on the gin, please."

The bartender--some tall, skinny blonde--nods quickly, easily taking Liam's old glass and handing him a new one right after. Liam raises his eyebrows, impressed.

"Nice." He says, and the girl laughs, loud and giggly. 

Liam winces. He knows that laugh, it's the one girls use when they want something out of him, like an invitation to a party or maybe, in this case, an extra large tip. He smiles and hands her his card, though, watching as she winks at him and swipes it through the cash register, handing it back to him right as Harry and Zayn stumble over to the bar, sweaty and grinning.

"Jack and Coke!" Zayn cries.

"Sex on the Beach!" Harry adds, and the two of them dissolve into laughter.

"Irish Car Bomb!" Niall chimes in, suddenly appearing out of nowhere, and Harry can barely stand, falling onto Louis as he cracks up. 

"Whoops," he mumbles, and wraps himself around the boy, practically piggy-backing him. "Lou, m' _sleepy_." He whines, and Louis rolls his eyes.

"Figures. C'mon, I don't feel comfortable with how pink Niall is anyways. Let's call the car."

"One sec," Liam says, and turns to his drink, only a couple sips taken out of it. It'd be a waste of money to leave it unfinished.

"Drink it!" The bartender says, grinning wide. "YOLO!"

Liam can almost feel Zayn roll his eyes next to him, and he smirks as he downs the rest of the drink in one go. He slams the cup down, shuddering, hoping he didn't imagine how Zayn watched his throat as he swallowed and is now watching him lick the piney taste of the drink off his lips. He looks up at the girl in front of him, who's still smiling happily, looking a bit starstruck, her gaze flittering from Zayn to Liam and back. Well. He might as well milk this for what it's worth. 

 

"So, babe." He starts, and he can feel Zayn tense up next to him as the girl blinks, surprised.

"Tina." She says.

"Yeah. Tina." Liam leans forward over the bar. He's wearing one of the cut-up tanks he made with Niall a couple months ago, and he knows his biceps look good like this. "What time d'you get off, hun?"

Tina blushes, obviously not expecting this, but smiles shyly anyways. Zayn, on the other hand, is staring at Liam, jaw slack, and Liam throws him what he hopes comes off as an uninterested glance before focusing his attention on Tina.

"Um. I get off in an hour? But, uh, if you wanna, like, meet up, it might be a bit longer?"

"You got a pen?" Liam asks, and watches, amused, as Zayn clears his throat and Tina scrambles for a pen and a cocktail napkin. Liam scribbles down their hotel address and his room number, winking at Tina before pushing the napkin back to her. "I'll see you around, babe."

"Yeah, sure. Definitely." Tina replies, and Liam smirks, pushing himself off the counter and walking off towards the exit of the club, laughing to himself as he hears Tina squeal with excitement behind him.

 

Zayn appears next to him, frowning. "What was that?" He asks, his words slurred. 

"That, my _friend_ ," Liam says, placing a lot of emphasis on the word, "was me pulling for the night. So, y'know, steer clear of my room tonight."

"You can't just--" Zayn says, struggling to hold onto Liam's arm as he's shoved a bit in the crowd. His nails dig into Liam's triceps and Liam bites his lip in response. "You can't just _do_ that, Liam. That's not fair."

"It's not _fair_?" Liam repeats, eyebrows rising, as they finally reach the other three boys. The car's already there, waiting for them, as are the paparazzi. "You're one to talk about _fair_ , mate."

Zayn stops walking to the car, grabbing Liam's forearm and turning him around so they're face to face. The photographers roar and the flashes go off, faster and more intense than before. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"This is not the time or place to be discussing this." Liam hisses. "And for once I wish we could discuss this when we were _sober_ , like normal people. But you just can't have that, can you, Zayn?"

 

"Lads!" Louis calls, and Liam turns away from Zayn, fuming, pushing himself into the car, in between a snoring Niall and a very cuddly Harry. Zayn follows soon after, tripping onto the seat, letting Louis pull him in the rest of the way.

"God, I hate the nights when I'm the most sober." Louis mumbles, chuckling. He looks over at Zayn, though, and his expression falls. "What's up, bro?" He asks, concerned, but Zayn offers no response, just staring out of the window. His demeanor seems calm, but Liam glances down a bit and sees how Zayn's leg is shaking uncontrollably. 

It excites him but shatters him at the same time, because he loves that he's riling Zayn up like this, loves how he's making Zayn feel as shit as he's felt over these past few weeks, but at the same time he can't stand doing this, wants to pull Zayn into his arms and kiss him as an apology.

 

By the time they pull up to the hotel, Zayn is so wound up that even Louis can tell, shaking his head as Zayn shoots out of the car as soon as it stops. He turns behind to Liam, who now has both Niall and Harry spread over him, both of them completely knocked out.

"You better fix this, mate. And fast."

 

\------

 

"Zayn!" Liam calls, pounding on Zayn's door. "Zayn, open up. I know you're in there. And I know you're not asleep either."

Liam can hear a bit of shuffling from inside the room, but no response otherwise. He sighs.

"Look. I--I'm sorry, okay? I got mad. I wasn't--I'm not going to sleep with that girl. It was just to make you jealous, okay? But I know you can't say that I didn't have a reason to feel so annoyed with you. And now I'm standing out here, in the hallway, talking to a closed door, looking like a total knob--"

The door swings open and Zayn's standing there, in his briefs and not much else. He looks tired, if anything, and much less drunk than he did at the club. His hair's not really coiffed anymore, just mussed and pressed down on his forehead, still damp from what was probably a pretty unsatisfying shower.

"Come in." He says, his voice quiet, but Liam hesitates nonetheless before he walks into the room. It's significantly cooler than Liam's, for some reason, and his bed is made, of course, his almost-empty suitcase tossed in the corner. Zayn sits on the corner of the bed, staring at his palms intensely. 

 

"So." Liam starts, rubbing his hands on his jeans. "I--"

"I'm in love with you." Zayn says, so quietly that it takes Liam a while to realize Zayn's spoken. Once his words sink in, Liam is frozen to the ground, as if he's rooted himself to the floor of the hotel room. 

"I'm in love with you, and I couldn't say it. I can't say it. It's so _hard_ , Liam, and I--I don't want to disappoint you, I don't want to disappoint everyone who expects so much of us, and I just feel so horrible every time that I get completely pissed, out of control, and then all I can think about is you, only you, and I just want you to _hurt_ me, but the only way you'll do that is if you do it when we're making love, and having you punish me like that is the only way I can live with myself and look at you the next day and--and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Liam, but I'm _so_ in love with you and I can't do this. I'm so scared and I know you don't fall in love by halves but I'm scared and I don't want to fuck everything up like I always do."

Liam's silent for a while, absorbing everything Zayn has just said. "Okay." He says, finally, and Zayn looks up, eyes welling up with tears.

" _Okay_?" Zayn says, sniffing. "I pour my heart out to you and you say 'okay'?"

Liam chuckles and shrugs. "I'm still a bit numb, to be honest." He says. "Um. I don't--like." He sighs, frustrated, and walks a step closer to Zayn, crossing his arms. "Okay, look. Zayn, you fucked me up, okay? Plain and simple. Like, _really_ fucked me up. You--" Liam sighs. "You broke my heart."

Zayn nods slowly in understanding. Liam sighs again and steps closer to Zayn, eventually just sitting down next to him on the bed. 

 

"We're pretty pathetic, huh?" Zayn says, after a minute. Liam laughs.

"That's a good word for it, I suppose."

"So," Zayn continues, swallowing nervously, "what do we do now?"

"Well." Liam replies. "I mean. I guess this is the most sober we've ever been in this kind of situation, huh?" Zayn smirks and nods. "So, like. I mean. Now that--y'know, now that it's all been settled and stuff, maybe we could--I mean, because I've always imagined us, y'know, but when we were both aware of what was going on and--"

"You want to have sex?" Zayn asks, eyebrows raised. Liam can't tell if he looks more annoyed or impressed. "Liam, we just--" Zayn chuckles, waving his arms around. "We just had this whole… _thing_."

"Yeah, and," Liam replies, slowly moving his hand over so that his fingers are intertwined with Zayn's. He licks his lips, inhaling a shuddering breath. "I love you. I just--I need to have this, Zayn. Please."

 

Liam closes his eyes, waiting for Zayn to sigh disappointedly or shuffle away from him, but neither happens. Instead, he opens his eyes after a minute or so, and turns to see Zayn smiling, giving Liam that soft, special grin that he's missed so much.

"Okay. Okay, sure." Zayn says, quietly, and Liam is almost choked up now, and he doesn't even know why.

"Okay?" He asks, because he wants to make sure, because he _needs_ to know that Zayn wants this, with him, without the dark cloud of drunkenness hanging over the two of them.

Zayn's grin widens. "Yes. Definitely."

 

Liam's heart _soars_. There's honestly no other way to describe it. He wants to scream in joy, wants to cry, wants _so_ much but all he can get himself to do at this moment is let out a broken sound of disbelief and reach out, grabbing Zayn by his shoulder and pulling him close. He doesn't do much more than just touch their foreheads together for a little while, because he loves how heightened his senses are at this moment, how he can feel Zayn's jumping heartbeat and smell the soft mint of his toothpaste.

Their mouths are almost touching, their lips barely a centimeter apart when Zayn breaths out Liam's name and closes the gap, pressing their mouths together into a long, deep kiss. Liam can't help but moan as Zayn leans in more, sighing into the kiss and sliding their tongues together.

They kiss passionately like that, the only noise in the room the wet slide of their lips and the occasional breathy moan. They don't stop until Liam's head finally starts to feel dizzy and heavy, and he pulls back, breathing hard.

 

"Oh my _god_ ," he says, and Zayn nods eagerly in agreement.

"We _really_ need to do that more often." He mumbles, then nudges Liam's shoulder until Liam falls back onto the mattress. "In the future." He adds, as an afterthought, climbing onto Liam's lap.

"No," Liam whines, trying to pull Zayn down onto him. "Right now."

Zayn hushes him, winking playfully before he reaches down, pushing at the hem of Liam's top until it bunches up under his armpits. Liam sighs but smiles, pulling his shirt off, and then goes ahead and does the same with his sweats, so he's matching Zayn in just his underwear. 

Humming happily, Zayn ghosts his fingers down Liam's chest, tweaking his nipples just a bit before pressing down on his abs. 

"God, you're so _fit_." He mutters, shaking his head in what looks to be disbelief before pressing his ass down a bit so that it's pressed snugly against Liam's cock. "Wanna ride you."

Liam moans then, biting his lip. "Shit. Yes."

Zayn shifts a bit, standing up on the bed to pull his briefs off, and motions for Liam to do the same. Once Liam's naked, Zayn sits back down, but a bit lower this time, his thighs pressed to Liam's. "Bedside table, second drawer."

Liam reaches out, blindly, feeling around until he's able to pull the drawer open and pull out whatever's inside. His hands close around a bottle and arousal surges through him as he hands Zayn the lube. He's sure he's blushing, especially by the way Zayn's smirking, but he couldn't care less, eager to see what Zayn's going to do next.

 

Zayn pours some lube into his hand--wait, okay, _both_ his hands--and then reaches down, using his palms to encase both his and Liam's cock. Liam shudders and can feel a wave of goosebumps spread out over his skin, and Zayn continues smiling, twisting and turning his hands, rubbing them back and forth and up and down until Liam's bucking into his grip.

"I'm gonna come like this," Liam warns, and Zayn scoffs.

"Amateur." He teases, then lets go of their dicks, reaching for the bottle of lube again. 

It slides easily out of his grip, though, his hands still slippery, and Zayn sighs, exasperated, trying and failing to grasp the bottle at least two more times before Liam laughs and easily picks it up, spreading the lube on his own fingers and pulling Zayn down so that their chests are pressed together.

"I've got this." He mumbles, and Zayn squeezes his eyes shut, lets out a soft moan as Liam pushes his middle finger in. He works it in and out slowly, pacing himself based off of Zayn's stuttering breaths. 

He remembers the last time they did this, so completely wasted out of their minds, and wondered if he even fingered Zayn open that time, or if Zayn had done it himself, sloppy and messy, and scolds himself for even thinking that it had been special or amazing because this--here, now, with Zayn shaking on top of him and moaning out his name, Zayn's cock rubbing against his hipbone, Zayn's intense heat enveloping Liam's fingers as he pumps in and out--is beyond anything Liam could have ever imagined. 

 

"I'm ready," Zayn whispers into Liam's chin, his lips tickling Liam's beard. "I'm ready, _please_ , I need--"

"Yeah, yeah." Liam agrees, and slides his fingers out. He almost reaches for the lube but his cock's still slick from before, from Zayn's hands, so just shifts the two of them, pushes Zayn a bit lower till the tip of Liam's cock is brushing against him.

Zayn hisses and suddenly sits up with renewed fervor, moving himself back and taking control of the situation. He finds Liam's cock with his hands, gives it a couple tugs, and then sinks down on it easily, moaning the entire way down.

"Holy _shit_." Liam spits. He can't stop staring at Zayn's heaving chest or the way Zayn's cock is bobbing up and down, shiny and flushed red. Zayn’s literally _bouncing_ on Liam's dick, not even leaning forward for support, just on his knees, moving up and down, their skin smacking together.

"Looks like you've had some practice." Liam mutters--a bit bitterly, he'll admit--throwing his head back and grunting as Zayn clenches around him as a retort. Zayn leans down then, pressing his hands flat against Liam's chest for support as he grinds against Liam's hips. 

"I've practically worn my dildo out." He replies, grinning as Liam cusses and then grabs Zayn’s hips tight, fucking up into him.

"You can't just-- _shit_ ," Liam says, strained, as his hips pound up into Zayn. "You can't just say shit like that and expect me not to-- _fuck_ ," he cries, and then he's coming, hard, inside Zayn. His eyes are squeezed shut but he can't stop fucking Zayn, going through the movements until it actually hurts to continue. He slows down, eventually laying back down and blinking his eyes open, his vision hilariously spotty.

 

It takes him a minute to realize that he's pulled out of Zayn, and when he's snapped back to reality, Liam looks up and sees Zayn fucking himself on four of his own fingers, his hand a blur on his cock, Liam's name on his lips.

He lets out a loud moan as he comes, striping Liam's chest with it, and then falls, exhausted, on top of Liam, shuddering and sweaty. 

"Jesus _Christ_ ," Liam mutters, and chuckles, leaning down to kiss Zayn's forehead. Zayn tips his head up and blinks slowly, smiling and pressing their lips together in small, sweet kisses that slowly evolve into another intense makeout session.

By the time they finally break apart, Liam feels tacky and dirty. He frowns. "Let's take a shower, babe."

"I _just_ took one." Zayn mutters, shaking his head, but rolls over anyways, standing up on wobbly legs. Liam turns to look at him and catches sight of his ass, painted with bruises from Liam's grip on it, and smirks. He sees a little bit of his cum trickle out of Zayn and his breath hitches, his cock suddenly twitching in interest.

Zayn must have felt it happen, because he cackles as he walks--well, hobbles--to the bathroom. "Easy there, tiger." He calls out, and Liam rolls his eyes as he follows Zayn.

 

He steps up behind Zayn after he's turned the hot water on and swivels them around so they're facing the mirror.

"Look how good you look." He mutters into Zayn's ear, nipping his earlobe. Zayn grins.

"Look how good _we_ look." He corrects, and Liam smiles just as wide, kissing Zayn's neck. "Now hurry up and get in the shower, I can't keep your spunk in me forever." 

Liam scoffs, mock-offended, but follows Zayn into the spray of warm water, still smiling as he pulls him in for a kiss.

 

\-----

 

When Liam wakes up, the sun's barely risen, the sky still painted a soft pink-purple. He sighs and doesn't move, afraid that if he does, everything's just going to fall apart again.

He doesn't look, doesn't even breathe, because he can't handle another broken heart.

 

But then he feels something--a small shift behind him, a warm arm wrapping around his chest, a pair of soft lips pressed against the nape of his neck.

"You stayed," he whispers, blinking back tears, and Zayn turns him around so that he's hovering over Liam, shushing him as Liam tries his hardest not to cry. Zayn smiles, running a careful hand through Liam’s hair, and leans down to kiss Liam’s forehead.

"I'm never leaving again." Zayn replies.

 

And Liam finally lets himself fall.

 

\------------

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Please feel free to sign up for the ficathon if you'd like!!! I didn't really put a closing date because I never want this to not be a thing ha
> 
> You can find me on [Twitter](http://twitter.com/slashterfic) and [Tumblr](http://slashter.tumblr.com)!


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